Today went out to plaza singapura with ah siao. Back pain like siao. Hahax. We went around stabbing people? ;x gg crazy. Hyper tgt. Luff tgt. Eat tgt. Shop tgt. Emo tgt. Hahax. And who knows we will meet him in BK. So got fate sia. Stop looking at me with those eyes. I will gorge them out of you. >:[ anyway ah siao u are not ugly lo. Dun keep saying u ugly. :] different people got different people de mei. :] we took a picture tgt ^^ I bought a earring from the shop u n her been too. And it’s the one that u told me abt.
I wanna watch transformer! So good u can go watch. HUMPH. 940 jiu 940 lo. Liao bu qi. HUMPH. BO JIO. So ungentleman. xD gorge ur eyes the next time I see u. >:[
The mrt is the funniest part. I didn’t predict that her shoe will fly out. So funny lor! And the pcbunk so wan chou de. Like tt also cannot void account sia. Sots.
My grandparents at my house le. Jumbo is sleeping. Grandpa still unpacking his things. :S and this is the month where I smsed the little-est of my entire life. Cus no love one msged ma. Hahahax. :]
Kudos people.
Today was a tired day. Went home with the remaining class mates. Rid, chun hao and gu niang. Waited for buses. No hanging out anymore. She slept soundly on the train till her stop. :] she decided not to have dinner no matter how bad the cramp be. Hospitalized and so be it. Sliced up all the fruits. The blade nearly got her fingers. Its very sharp. Somemore slicing at top speed. Doesn’t matter.
Yesterday I had a great day. Cant believe how much fun it is with u guys. Shoot! :] hope my everyday is filled with such happiness. Returned home and realize that you are testing me all along. Why? I cared so much for you. You didn’t even wanna tell me the truth of what’s gg on. What do you expect me to do… I just cant believe you will test me.
She thinks back and said: “remember those times where you use to hold my hand tightly and never let go? Because you are worried that I might trip and fall. Remember the piggy back ride you gave me? Because I was tired. Remember when I got hurt and you were crying? That particular wound. Remember every time we depart we cried? Every time you sent me home. I still remember… how you are there just for me.”
‘one pill per day, the silent killer awaits. You made her turn cruel and heartless.’
She said: “why did you bother to look back when you said you wouldn’t care anymore. Why will you bother to steal a glance from me to see who am I with?”
Since you felt I’m nothing to you at all.
Why did you still turn back to look at me.
…if you really love him you should be able to let him go. Even if he is with another person whom he really loved. He will be happy, if you just let him go.
She said:
“ My heart won’t ache,
If I don’t see him.
My mood won’t change,
If I don’t think of him.
My appetite won’t turn worse,
If I don’t look at him.”
“When I’m trying to heal,
He used a blade and carved something on me.
He carved his name, and left his memories.”
“I’m picking up the bandages and wrap those bleeding wounds,
Why must you test my heart,
When its for real.
I tried to cared,
But I got reject.
Just because you are testing my heart,
Now you know it,
How you feel?”
what can you expect from me? when you kept rejecting... if you were me, how do you feel if i test your heart?
Always said I would know where to find love,
Always thought I'd be ready and strong enough,
But some times I just felt I could give up.
But you came and you changed my whole world now,
I'm somewhere I've never been before.
Now I see, what love means.
It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go,
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been,
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.
In my heart, in my head, it's so clear now,
Hold my hand you've got nothing to fear now,
I was lost and you've rescued me some how.
I'm alive,
I'm in love you complete me,
And I've never been here before.
Now I see, what love means.
When I think of what I have, and this chance I nearly lost,
I cant help but break down, and cry.
Now I see, what love means...
There are weird happenings on me.
My left eyelid kept twitching ytd.
Ytd, when I was bathing.
Suddenly the water became cold and little.
I tot my mother was home. Then she use water so the water became lesser.
After tt.. THEN she return home.
So I wondered.
Did papa returned?
I really missed him.
Then jus now when I was bathing.
I rmb-ed I nva scratched my chest at all. Not breast. Is chest =.=
Then I realize when I was soaping myself, there are scratch lines. :X 2 somemore.
Then… I realize the bath room no towel. And I clearly heard the door closed… so I tot my mum is at home again.
So I continue to bath… thinking that after bathing I shout for my mum to get towel for me.
In the end. When I shout and shout. No one…
I was curious. I open the door and saw she is not back yet…
Maybe its my hearing gt problem?
Hmmms… xD then wad happen to the towel incident? ;p
I wore my clothes and ran to the room and found towel to dry myself lo! xD but v wet. xD running frantically across the house to get towel. Somemore…. LALALALA dun tell u so much xD
i can cook!
i can juice!
i can wash clothes!
and build my muscles!
bo bian. now alone le. home alone. everything mus learn how to do. nearly faint in toilet just now ;x
xD Seeya~
So bored in class leh. Neh neh. ;x
Who needs help in enterprise~ come come xD
Today its cognitive. Sibei sian. Haven start in the class room already see her. Sian ji pua. RAWRs.
Eugene: A! where I sit ah!?
Iman: on the floor…
*class burst out laughing*
Dam funny la u shld see how the class respond.
Then first break went to teach ppl calculations.
Never eat. :[
Second break got eat. xD
Finally im eating faster than most of them. Muahahx.
After sch thinking of the ingredients of my ****.
Then go see the prices and think of the CONCEPT.
:]
It’s a secret..
Now im all home alone. The feeling is terrible.
some unknown ppl knock my door T_T
im scare-ed
“Will you be here just for me?”
having the power to heal isnt it good? ;]
im oki le. no worries. thanks to you for being there for me ;]
shoulders aching.
cus whole day folding joss paper. ;x
hu wanna help me massage leh?
lai ah lai ah~ gam sia zui zui. xD
rock my world. :3
and i will share my cookie with you again.
half for me and half for you. :3
rmb those days?
Could someone just stop my tears?
Ytd went to cityhall walk around with ysl. Turns out I have no mood to continue the journey. Suntec has a lot of memories which cant be erased. Staying there will make my heart aches more.
There is a high chance that my grandparents will be moving in. which made me very loss and depressed over it. I don’t like them moving in. esp her. She changed and altered my life once. Making my life miserable. I cant imagine that this will happen this year. Why must so many obstacles happen this year. Why? After my father left and Edwin. I can barely stand up on myself. Why must you do this to me. Why.
Right now im here. With no support and no one cared. They are just busy with their own lives. Happily making everyday fulfilled for them. While me? Im always alone. Calling for help where no one noticed or bothered. Keep on running away from facts doesn’t make you strong. And it makes you weaker. Time Is running out. Less than 2 weeks time and they will be moving in. crying cant help I know. But its just so hard to carry on.
The burden is getting heavier. I will be rebellious. I wont return home. I will loiter my time away. Who knows what bad company hangs out there. Who knows what will happen to me. To him, his departure for our relationship is in the wrong state of time. Life has been very hard for me to carry on. Being all alone is not fun at all.
When you are all sad and down, there is no one that is there for you at that mean point of time.
You are left only with yourself.
So ask yourself.
Can you have the strength to carry on.
Will you be happy walking your path.
You are on your own now.
No one is here for you. Face it.
Reality is that harsh.
People only care for their own means and benefits.
They wont care about how are you doing now.
Just face it.
why bother to love someone who never returns.
does he even worth your tears?
don't say a word, i understand.you wanna know, if i'm still your man.girl can't you tell, by the touch of my hand.i'm gonna please you every way that i can.i'll hold you, [hold you]love you, [love you]i'll never let you go. [no let you go, let you go]for always, i'll stay.just look in my eyes and you'll know.baby i'll be there for you.where ever you go,what ever you do.girl, i've got forever inside,for all of my life,i'll be there for you.don't ever doubt,you're just a need.i'll give you my heart,so honestly.deep in my soul, baby you'll find a tree.i'll never change, boy i'll promised you.i'll hold you, [hold you baby]love you, [love you lady]i'll never let you go. [no let you go, let you go]for always, [for always]i'll stay. [i'll stay]just look in my eyes and you'll know.i'll be there for you,where ever you go,what ever you do.boy, i've got forever insidefor all of my life.i'll be there for you.nothing and no one can tear us apart, [tear us apart] you always be here inside my heart. [inside my heart]and just that sure as the star shine above, [stars shine above]no matter what else,you can count on my love.i'll be there for you,where ever you go,what ever you do. [you~ do]baby, girl i've got forever inside.for all of my life.i'll be there for you.i'll be there for you, [when the morning comes]
where ever you go, [when the evening falls]
what ever you do. [i'll be there baby girl]
boy i've got forever inside. [i've got forever]
for all of my life. [for all of my life]
i'll be there for you.i'll be there for you, [i'll be there]
where ever you go, [never go, no]
what ever you do.
baby, girl i've got forever inside.
for all of my life.
i'll be there for you.
Ooff on our way to vivo!~ so Qoo huh?
TGIF today! xDD guess the meaning yourself.
Hahahahax. So sians. Now im bloggin on the mrt while on the mrt journey. I miss hanging out. Miss a lot places. Miss time. Miss memories. Miss YOU. And D.D is listening to mp3 beside me now. And just now in school I was waiting lo. Wait till I can complete my rj and quiz le. Muahahahx. Then nearly slept in the rpc also. Cus v tired. ytd I dreamt of my papa. I think it’s the time after he’s dead because all my relatives were at my hse and they try to exorcise him. So bad. :[ he was at the com table wanna use the com to online like normal. Hahahx. I missed him a lot. :] and he was happy. :] hmmms. I think he is at my room ytd. Cus there is this moth at the wall which I think its him. Plus it’s the 5th week after he had passed away.
Time has passed so fast.
Just within one glance.
You had left me crying.
Since that day you left me.
_+*~The girl was lonesome thinking of her guy.~*+_
_+*~She waited for him for ages and ages. ~*+_
_+*~But the guy just didn’t contact her. ~*+_
_+*~Was it fate or was it hurt. ~*+_
_+*~Did he care when she was there~*+_
_+*~Waiting in vain when it starts to rain. ~*+_
Feeling hyper and crapped all day long. Making life interesting to live on.
Hang out, ate chippy’s, shopped, meet new people. :]
Kevin and his darling. Hahahahahahax
NEVER SEE BEFORE EYELINER AH.
Where got ppl call ppl eyeliner one. =.=
V weird meh wearing eyeliner. =.=
Rawrs.
You live with the white board. So you are call markers >:[
I think you are a black marker. So bad de.
And im not eyeliner! Im jobelle :] :3
Kevin and marcus sitting on the tree~
K-I-S-S-I-N-G~ xD
No offense Kevin. xD jus wanna make fun of markers.
So weird for 2 guys to go uncle ringo. :l hahahx invite us go there walk also sial. Sorry no time. Hehs. Mama waiting for US to go home. :p
Bored in class. Hahahahax. Today is computing. Heard it is hard. But I believe that my group will make it. xD our grp for 6 ppl~ hyuu!
GUMA kana joel’s grp. Orh bi. xD the facci called kumar till GUMA laugh till my stomach so pain. X)
“you can run away but you cant hide
through a storm and through a lonely night
then I’ll show you there’s a destinity
the best things in life they are free.
But if you wanna cry
Cry on my shoulder
If you need someone who cares for you
If you’re feeling sad your heart gets colder
Yes I’ll show you what will love can do.
I will always stay here by your side,
I promise you I’ll never hide.”
So into this song nowadays. What it means is really true. :]
I really hope I can get a good grade for my UT. Muahahhax.
I think I will be able to see him later. Just plainly trying luck. :]
I was dozing off in the train with my music blasting loud.
While I dreamt of you, you didn’t make a sound.
U smiled at me like you once did.
But since that day, we never meet.
Now I’m healing up and positive,
But im still waiting as you can see.
_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_* just a little poem *_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_waiting for someone to just love me
Back at home! So tired T_T tml got UT again sia………… *whines*
Went to icekimo. Had a BIG BIG ICEBERG… =.= I was like there whining, I dam hungry laaa I wanna eat I want eat something. Dam hungry…
And they are like… act TIA BOH. T_T D.D ate old chunky or what ever u spell it.
Then I saw pineapple pie n was…. *fell silence*
Then bo bian lo, I today belly good. I just went ahead with ice kimo without eating any food. Plainly ice cream goes in the stomach first… 8 ball…S
On the bus I was laughing hysterically. All the people are looking at me I think. xD so ps. But hack care. MUAHAHAHX.
‘one smart fella, he felt smart.’
‘two smart fella, they felt smart’
N it goes on till 100. xD
And the M.E.T thingy =.= that one is like I laugh till my stomach gonna cramp le. WHY MUS U AIM MY MICKEY HUH! U KNOW MICKEY BLUR TILL LIKE SO KAWAII THEN U STILL SO KAJIAO n DI XIAO MICKEY. xD
Icekimo’s WILD STRAWBERRY, I tell u uh! Better dun order tt. Sucks sia. Dam sour. I taste it first, FULL OF EXPRESSION sia. Then I like diam diam… then they try. Then I see their face I luff like hell. Im like so mean today la. Then after tt went high. Became cam whore. Almost kissed mickey. xD fooling ard sia. Hug, kisses, kong fu, smiles, hyper, hysterical, bangals, pipos, butts, emo, fighting, n stuffs.
Nth better to do. Then mickey went home le. The rest go walk walk to the plaza. Emoing on the way cus jobelle is emo? xD n she does seriously crazy stuffs. She screamed in public, whines, disgracing or what ever crap you can think of. Hahahax. LIM LIIM LIM! LIM what? LIM JIU LA! KA GI LAI…
Someone forbid me to LIM. T_T I even prepare everything le… then kana forbidden. Nvm. I WAIT till u got mood then we LIM LIM tgt. Or drink drink oki? :] *mooacks* buy home drink also no mood. I was looking at the wine and alcohol section then D.D “WHOA!” till very loud. Cus u see the price ur specs drop… then D.D say, you sure? So ex and you wanna LIM with it? Then I say “YA.” *BIG SMILE* xD D.D say im nuts. Damn.
Go home tt time, D.D my angel again, wait till my bus come then go. Hahahax. I so kind sia, pei D.D walk till the next bus stop leh. Then the lamp pole thingy got the lid. D.D brushed and knock and the whole piece of metal came off! Damn. I help to fix back in the end my pinky meat kana kiap. T_T RAWRs
Took the bus and went home. :] and here am i. n momo-nii. You nag one more time I LIM you with sakae then u know. xD
Hyuu! Blogging in class. Today we finish our ppt SUPER early and finally akuma is contributing the right things. :]
Hope I will be healthy soon. *sniff*
Later will be gg out with my mickey and ah DEAR xD
:]
Gg to return comics and to eat icekimo tgt. Muahahax. Those were the days. :] maybe go drink too. :]
MOMO! Missed ya. :]
Rid! Thanks for the songs. You rocks like rock! ;x
So bored. So cold in class. Lots of laughter and jokes will make you happy :]
Ppl call me by the name now. Isn’t it good? :]
Later call momo to massage my shoulders. Aching le. By the way. He n tsu-tsu will be staying at my hse till duno when. :] so many photos~ goodies~ loveable loves~ xD wont be lonely anymore :]
he told me :
love the one that holds your hand till the end,
love the one that cherish you,
love him as he loves you too,
i will be there for you if you need me to. :3
HEY! KNOW WHAT! I HAVE JUST COMPLETED 2 OUT OF 3 RJ'S FOR TODAY. xD and i am going to chiong finish today's module one.
1 is today's talk on pharmaceutical one
1 is national library one
both checked and done
lastly is die die today mus hand in one
1 is communication RJ
which is ...
#&%$*#^$#*@$^ :D
*psst* see that guy in white?
YA YA!
* know who is he?
YA YA!
* and the hot pink girl with him?
duh.... the *** *** la!
*ya, and they are sitting tgt leh...
OUHHHHHH -take binoculars and see*
:] see who is talking now?
yu huu~
I gladly announce that im sick. ;D and no one to take care of me. :]
No one to rush down my house anymore le.
And guess who’s here?
After school I get to talk my heart out and how I felt.
Thanks for that listening ear of yours.
:]
I felt better.
Make me scream and go crazy again! :D
And steven approached me since Monday…
But im like avoiding him la. Hahahahx.
Duno why I everyday will get to see him.
=.=
While those I wanna see didn’t manage to. :]
~ the white guy and the hot pink lady sitting side by side <3~
i think im getting sick soon. sadded.
i cant breathe.
i keep sniffing since this morning.
did i caught a cold last night?
anyway today eugene caught attention that i got put on make up. xD
then he insisted i got put lip stick. which i didnt. :]
invisible lipstick. powderful sia.
_+_+_+_+_+_ pucker up guys <3_+_+_+_+_+_later on im gonna have three cheese pizza~ hyuu!~
today like so many ppl talk to me online but they bo chup me xD
im tired. im like so drowsy on the train. hehs Xp
keep sleeping, then gong gong de.
and that mean joel. EDIOT. stop hitting my head can?
n don make my hair.
dont say that u hit v soft.
guys, although ur strength is soft. but the impact on us GURLS are huge.
so its PAIN de oki. P.A.I.N
i hit back REAL hard de. :]
do again and u will see.
dun bully singles just because she is helpless.
out today with a gang of 7 :]
shopped.
sakaed.
drank.
eat.
shop again.
earthquaked.
and luff like lunatics.
:]
fun?
duno later will go out boogie a not.
muahahahx
-+-+-+- come on baby, shake those bons-+-+-+-
yu huu~~ here comes my 100th post for this blog. xD
later i think i will be out all day.
either is ppl jio me, or with someone.
muhahahax.
she loves boogie-ing.
and she boogied her way throughout the night.
simply lovely~
boogie as in the form of dancing. nth else. :]
one more thing to add.
my heart is aching again.
technically aching. not heartbreak or wad.
is suddenly u have a v strong cramp in the heart.
is the 'thing' coming back to haunt me?
will my sickness be confirm or i will faint in sch someday?
hu knows... "]
i might cant breathe someday...
hehs. still not in bed yet. :p
today is father's day.
Happy Father's Day, Daddy! :] *loves*
i missed ya.
and tml will be his one month death anni.
time passed real fast that i just cant take it and admit it.
hais. i cant slp. slpless nights. who knows. :] have been thinking alot of things. things tt have changed so much.
maybe tml i will be my dolly self n go out roaming the streets alone.
lets see how long ppl can notice me after rotting. xD
:] im not gonna tag his blog any more. or question him about his blog anymore.
not tagging - he treats me invisible. he rather find other ppl to talk with abt his blog. nvm then :]
question - he gets irritated by me.
what else? sooner or later, we hardly can maintain as frens anymore.
cus he is avoiding me obviously. :]
heh heh~ my wound the flesh already healing le. although when touch dao will pain. ;x then mama cut the skin away from me. hahahax pain ah~~
but hor. another new wound appear. hehs. dun tell mei yin. later she slaughter me. xD
its at my toe. the nail came off when i making it then bleed. can see the flesh also. hehs. only the blog knows n i know. heh. shhhh. Xp
_*+*+ I am loved, because I didn't give up +*+*_
Good morningi everybody!~ kinda late till noon though. Hahahax. Hmmms. I slept till ard this time then I woke up. Hehs. Too nice to slp le? Or im too tired? Hahax anyway. My wounds are recovering. God bless those who cared oki? But nvr to be sure they wont appear again. :]
D.D is out for camp. Which left me so lonely. Sobs. Missed missed. TnT
Next news, momo is returning with him too. Wahahax! It will be fun. Muahahax.
O0o0o0o0o0o I forgot to blog abt smth abt recently. I dreamt of him 4 nights. Wahahahax! Sweet dreams nehhhh. I kinda miss sch. From the first day of holiday. xD then when I go back to sch? I will miss holidays.
Dumb hor? Im such a dumber, why will ppl still like me? I wonder.
Today went to NLB with mei yin. So dao mei leh. I wear till nice nice tot can go beach de… then she say no beach beach le. No sand for emo jobelle to play. Later she kill the angel jobelle and ruled her body how? Nono. Cannot. :] Hahax. D.D say my wound disgusting. Blehs. See my skin peeling? Thanks a lot.. :] had fun. V cold. Almost fainted. Bleeding profusely like no one cares :] cant control my blood anyway. Let it flow~ let it flow~
Thanks to QIXUAN and HAFIZ~ for being there for me ytd :] they are persuasive hahax. But not as good to overcome my emoness. In the end I bian guai again :] QIXUAN say wanna give my present when we meet.
_+ I love ya sweety +_ *Mooacks*
Walk my life with me till the end oki?
Always love ya :] we still got many many years to walk on. :] hand in hand~ lalalala <3
Ai si ni le. MOOACKS ^^
Tml he is gonna treat me a BIGBIG meal. XD the bigger the best Xp
N ya… “He” is returning soon. xD so happy. Come come. Muahahahax. Guess hu? No one knows. Gg to air port to fetch him ba. Maybe he will come my hse stay. Pei pei wo. If not I home alone. xD im sure he wont let me emo de. :S *HUGS*
Feelings… it can be just passion, lust, happiness, shame, sadness, boredom, heartbroken and stuff.
If I like you?
: - it doesn’t mean I love you.
If I love you?
:- means I love and like you.
If I am in love with you?
:- I will go all means to give you happiness. Just so that I can fulfill your love for me.
What happiness?
:- no matter soul, heart or body.
If there is passion?
:- doesn’t mean there will be lust.
Doest passion, lust and shame links tgt?
:- it depends on what you did.
What can passion and lust lead u to?
:- destruction…
:- happiness (:
:- sadness ):
:- and heart brokened
Booya!~ just wanna let u guys know that managing blogs can be quite a hassle cus u will need to post multiple posts to keep those readers coming. xD requires time, patience, events to post n blahs.
He said he doesn’t love me anymore.
Shld I say I felt relieved? Or I felt sad? Relieve is due to knowing how he feels abt me. Sad is tt I cant have hopes anymore.
Hmm. Lets stay as friends first ba :]
I was folding joss paper, watching anime, eating cookies, talking on msn yesterday. That’s how I spend my day home alone. Hahax. Everyday is almost the same. Maybe I was running a marathon. Running from the fact tt my father left me. Thinking tt he was on a long long holiday enjoying himself. Sometimes I hope he’ll really return back to me. I watched those crappy videos of me n him. At least I can hear him, see him. Like wad I said to my mum, ‘stay cheerful. Cant u see that he had left us all happy memories because he was cheerful always?’ but there will be sadness. Of cus this period of time is very hard to over come. And time has been passing very fast. Sometimes I wonder. Will I forget him soon after? Will i?
Those hu knew me well knows I have stm. Short term memory. But. There is a memory tt u wont know. I can store memories as pictures. Yup. That how I rmb my past and childhood v well. N there are weird things like…. When I cry v hard because of smth I didn’t really like [maybe it made me angry, sad, agony] after crying… I will forgot wad am I crying for. Lets say im crying over a guy…. Then… after tt I realize why did I cry for him? N feel distant from him. Cus part of the memory has been erased. So my brain will think. Hu is he? Oooo someone I knew… tts all. I wont get to rmb like ‘wat did he like? Dislike? Character n blahs’ so tts y I hardly cry :] at least I will still rmb. Cus tt is the painful memory tt I have been trying to erase.
Hahax. And I talked with iman abt a lot of things. xD so fun. Abt rocking asses. Wad kind of person is joel actually. I think the whole class thinks he is a perv. N his test stated lots of v weird qns. =.= and I checked the box with NO! YOU MORONIC DISGUSTING FREAK! xD then iman n I chatted till…..350 am? Cus its like I watching anime. Chase chase chase… then he watching war video… tt pervvv. Then we like nva talk… but I keep spamming him like. SIANS. So BORED. SO SIAN. RAWs just to disturb him throughout. xD till 350 when I was dead tired then I nva disturb him le. The anime is v addictive due to it’s a detective anime. Muahahax. Ppl get killed and u find clues. Whats with the oysters? I wonder…
Today is home alone again. I will be at home! NO FOOD TO EAT!
GOSHHH. HOW? GEEs~
here are the pics. for ah pek, who made holes in my blog...
the pics at the ubin is in another blog of mine. those who know can enter.
i hate ppl to disrespect me.
like my aunts
both the same.
come in my room and just lie on my bed
no permission asked
really treat as their home.
i wonder
if i go to their house.
i sleep on their beds.
how they feel then?
crude ppl ruling the world.
crude crude ppl.
*should i buy that bag? i thought and thought and thought of it. seriously did i really need it? *
hen sad.
xing zhen de hen tong.
cried just now.
eyes still aching in pain now.
why must he leave me?
leave me in pain
suffering alone
same for ben and leonard.
left me battered and hurt.
bleeding from the heart
just now i really thought of slitting again.
i prepared a msg that was gg to send him.
"i miss you'' and i paused by his number.
thinking...
will he reply?
will he be bothered?
or just continue to play his games?
then i decided to come online. he is online.
but i didnt wanna talk to him.
cus the pain it hurts.
hurts alot
that make my tears roll.
feel my blood
leaking from my heart
feel my tears
coming from my pain
feel my face
drenched in my tears
feel the embrace
that i yearn from you
i doubt he will come and read my blog.
i doubt he will felt how i feel.
i doubt... did he still love me?
try calling my name
let me hear your voice one more time
try looking for me
cause i will be visible for you
try being closer with me
cause i enjoy your presence
try loving me
if you heart still loves me so.
i became fed up of myself
which made me wanna end my life
slit and made my blood flow
why did u let my hand go
why did u let those kisses stop
why did u let those hugs loose
why did u let your presence left
why did u make me feel so hurt and u didnt bother to steal a glance at me
looking at how pathetic i am without you.
hoping that you will return to me...
为什么你这么狠心，丢下我一个人。一个没有你的人。
jobelle is back from chalet.
she is tired.
she will be loading up photos soon.
she says take care to you all visitors.
she loves you guys that sms-ed her during the chalet time.
she said thanks.
and she wants her bestie to drink more water, take loads of care and have better health.
PS: take honey or pipa gao. :] its good for ya throat. MOO-acks
Today had to go to sch la, although its Friday. Which for RP its like one day till holidays… since ytd is a holiday ma. Then a lot ppl don wanna go. :l
I go school… ALONE again :’[
At first our class is very fulled de. Ppl like dom dom, yi xuan, those some time will skip de also came le… but in the first break right. All zhao liao. Left 7 guai kia. Including me.
Which 7?
Here are the 7 dwarfs…
Rid. Jun xiang. Chun hao. Lucien. Eugene. Wei xian. ME.
Pathetic leh. All zhao go watch movie. Ai xi mai xi. Cus I don’t wanna miss one more and left with 14 chances for the 16 weeks. Cus u wont know when you will be heavily sick, or smth bad happen.
This year is like a VERY BERRY BERLI BELLY BAD year to me. I lost my father, lost my stead, now my NIGHTMARE is gonna move in to my hse. MY TERRITORY. I hate her. So feel like crumpling her up and chew her into tiny weenie bits of pieces. >:[
Then hor. I love today lesson ^^ cus its easy and fun for me to do. >;D I beginning to LURB it. >;D mai jealous mai jealous :x
Sian ji puaaaa. I ate carbonara today. And a smelly cheeeeena girl cut my queue sia. CHEE BYE. Please don’t get offended. Firstly the queue its in a dam mess. Scattered de.. then she cuts in. standing beside me at first. With her fren. Then she try to go in front of me which I didn’t let her. Then the aunty ask her order first. Wth. The aunty is blind de lo. I feel like ripping her in pieces also. *shred shred shred* >:[
Then Eugene uncle ‘qing’ wo he ribena… but in the end I returned him 1 buck.. hahax. Cus I know he need $_$ for his car dream… I also joking de. Didn’t know he really tend to treat me. But I still returned his dollah.
Fast forward…. We didn’t do any ppt today which is so fun and due to we are left with 7 ppl… PATHETIC 7 dwarfs. :l :D
I did all my rj, evaluation and quiz in sch. I scored 5 for quizzy! So fun. ;D
Evan is smexi today ;] she said hi to me xDDDD
Im not les.. don’t worrli. Then I went home alone lo. Then hor, got this guai guai de uncle come and speak to me. Weird… he tot I foreigner sia, then he talk rubbish to me abt RP cutting the grass across the field. PARDON LAAAA, I don’t give a dam n hu are u man. Like santa claus. EEEEEEDIOT.
I kana shock tio by him. Cus I felt he’s a perv..
Then I went to another cabin on purpose… then saw a familiar back. Which is chun hao! He left so early n we can still meet on the cabin :l weird. He tot I walk v fast somemore. xD cus I travel like thunder and lighting! No la… I took bus instead of walking there. xD then I sit opposite him that row de leh. But then there is a IRRITATING sweaty smell which is so musky and heavy that gross me out. So I changed seat… to chun hao that row. But not next to him.. then hor, there is this nerdy boi came n sat beside me, which I tot nth much at first. Suddenly when I slept half way I felt his shoulder touching me. Which I shocked and open my eyes finding him LEANING nearer and nearer to me. Then I observed.. my eyes open big big \O_O/ I try to use lappy to block him n me then my mum called =.= so unlucky. After that I stand the whole journey home. And that’s all abt it. Im gg chalet. Anything just sms me or call me oki!?
BYE! BYe~ Bye~ bye~ by~ b~ …~ *echos*
